I Dream of You
by Rivulet027
Summary: Total AU, I wrote this while they were still in season 4 so its set in season 4. A dream demon's attack forces Spike to admit he has feelings for Willow. SW and BA
1. Prologue: Spike

Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with Buffy, it's Joss Whedon's toybox and I'm merely playing in it.

Author's Note: The first part is Spike's version of the nightmare. Also Angel and Riley meet for the first time in this fic. Also as much as I love Willow and Tara as a couple in order for this fic to work they're just friends. Finally in this fic Oz's return is his first return to Sunnydale. I know that makes this very AU, but I made it work as I could. I wrote this while they were still in season 4 for a friend of mine, she's a heavy B/A shipper and at the time I was a heavy Willow/Spike shipper. Hence this fic is dedicated to Lindsey. Also the first part to this might be confusing as it's what's happening to Spike, but also the nightmare replaying in his head.

_An unseen light illuminated her red hair as her green eyes turned upward to gaze at him. A smile played her lips at the sight of him, but as he reached out to touch her she slumped into his arms._

He looked down in horror as blood began to cover his hands and he pulled her weakening figure up against him, supporting her. As he did he looked past her and saw the scale covered dark clawed hand drop the dagger it had used to slice open its unsuspecting victim. Its red eyes caught his and the light bounced off its white fangs in time with its deep-throated laugh. His first instinct was to chase it, kill it for harming the girl bleeding in his arms, but as it disappeared into the inky blackness she became his only concern.

He pulled his T-shirt off trying to use it to stop the flow of blood. Its blackness was soon soaked in red. Blood was everywhere, on his hands, his arms; her life force was slowly seeping into the cold earth.

"Hang on Red," he begged as he wrapped her limp form into his duster, trying to use it in the same way as the shirt.

"It's okay Spike," she began to mummer as she raised a blood soaked hand to his face. With growing horror he realized she was covered in a layer of her own blood and still it oozed out of her. A thought struck him, how could someone so small lose so much blood? Blood was everywhere, it seemed to cover his entire field of vision.

The jacket was soon soaked and her eyes were beginning to glaze. Her head turned from his as if she couldn't stand to have him watch her die.

"No, Willow look at me. Look at me," he begged, "Good now listen to me. You have to hang on. I'm not going to let you die. You're not going to die."

He clutched her to his chest and started to rise when she went entirely limp. His sharp hearing heard her heart beat its last and he sank to his knees.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" the scream ripped through his throat as he rocked her back and forth keening. He cried her name over and over as tears washed his undead face. 


	2. Journey

Spike's eyes were open, as they had been for the last five nights. The hardness of the tomb under his back slowly came to him as the dream subsided. It took him a full minute to realize he wasn't still trapped in the unending haunting nightmare.

The next thing that struck him was his own weakness, a strange wrung out sensation that covered his body. Pangs of hunger rolled over him and with slight shock he realized he was slowly starving.

Memories of the last five nights came back to him, the dream playing over and over in his head causing him anguish. He also patchily remembered coherent times when he'd tried to get up. _Why?_

_Willow have to get to Red. Where would she be? With Slayer. Where Slayer? Watcher, watcher is..._ His face contorted as he tired to shift through his waning memories. Finally he was able to recall Giles' face. _Yes, Giles will know what is causing this. To save Red, must go Giles._

He wavered as he got to his feet, they felt like lead while his head felt so light.

_Willow looked up at him, her red hair illuminated by an..._

"Noooo!" he howled trying to shove the nightmare away from himself as he weaved towards the door._ Wait is it night or day? Why the bloody hell do I care the sun can end this pain, no have to save Red. Have to warn Willow. Watcher, get to Giles._

He glanced at one of the cracks in his crypt. It was as dark as...

_...his blood soaked T-shirt. There was blood everywhere, on his hands, his arms; her life force was slowly seeping into the cold earth._

A weak growl escaped his lips as he ripped the door opened. He stumbled out into the night weaving a path that would take him to Giles' apartment.

_"No, Willow look at me. Look at me. Good now listen to me. You have to hang on. I'm not going to let you die..."_

He slumped against the lamppost, gripping it for support. He chided away the pain that threatened to sink him back into the oblivion of the nightmare and stumbled onward.

_...her heart beat its last and he sank to his knees. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" The scream ripped through his throat as he rocked her._

The woman he'd stumbled into jumped, took one look at his screaming figure, and ran. He began whimpering, keening a familiar name.

_He cried her name over and over as tears washed his undead face._

With his last ounce of strength Spike slammed his fists against Giles' door. Weakened by his journey to the former watcher's home, his hunger, and the gnawing fear for the girl in his dream he began to slide to the floor. 


	3. Delirious Vampire

"I'm coming, I'm coming," Giles called as he set the book down. He opened the door only to have a delirious vampire slump onto him.

He stumbled back prepared to fight, then realized who it was, "Dear Lord. Spike what are you doing here?" Concern replace confusion as he looked down at the transparent white man._Dear God, his lips have even gone white._

"Spike... Spike," he called impatiently trying to get the vampire's attention. Spike's eyes were glazed as a single tear formed and slid down his face.

The undead man whimpered a single word that caused Giles heart to skip a beat, "Willow."

"Dear God! Spike! Spike! What happened to Willow?"

"Dead," the haunted face whispered before beginning to keen again.

Giles' head seemed to explode a the thought. Willow dead? Dazed he slammed the door shut and lead the semi-conscious vampire to the couch.

Spike remained as he'd been lain. He keened, whimpering the redhead's name and how he was going to murder the demon that killed her. Giles stood back and watched him a moment still too dazed for coherent thought.

_Buffy_, he thought suddenly as he grabbed the phone.

"Buffy, we need to find Willow. Apparently she and Spi..."

"Giles, she's with me, right here. What's going on?" Buffy interrupted sounding both concerned and confused.

Giles glanced at Spike laying and whimpering on his couch. "I need you both to get over here right now."

"When was the last time he ate?" Willow asked her voice sounding hollow. Her entire being was focused on the man lying on the couch, he was so very pale, so very week and yet whimpering her name.

"I don't know, from his appearance." Giles started then stopped as she went and knelt beside Spike's delirious form.

"Shhhh," she whispered, "I'm here."

The change in him was abrupt. He stopped muttering her name and his unfocused eyes slowly came to focus on her.

"You're not dead?" he asked in a delirious tone.

"No, I'm right here," she whispered softly looking into his worried stricken eyes.

"But there was so much blood and your heart stopped," his voice cracked and his eyes became unfocused again. His face took on a haunted look as he relived horrors.

"Spike...Spike," she called softly till she had his attention, "When was the last time you ate?"

His voice was far away, childish and fearful, "Before the nightmares."

"How long ago was that?" she pried softly.

"Four, five days."

Her voice became hollow again as she turned to her friends, "Buffy get some blood. Giles we need to find what's doing this, call Xander, tell him to bring Anya. Then call my friend Tara, if a demon is doing this she might be able to help us with a protection spell."

Buffy and Giles stood uncertainly a moment as Willow turned back to Spike.

"Giles, could this be a demon? Can they do that, send a vampire into delirium?"

"I don't know. We need to find if this is just a demon or a prophecy."

"Prophecy?" Spike whimpered fearfully. He tried to lift his arms to grab Willow and pull her to him, but his arms fell limply to his side. He growled in anguish and whispered, "So much blood."

Willow turned his face so he was looking at her. " I thought you liked blood."

His eyes darted over her face. "Not yours on the ground." 


	4. Enter Angel

Giles pulled Buffy aside, "Since she's come, he's calmed. He might be able to tell us more, but not if we don't get him some blood."

"I don't know Giles. Could this be just some way to hurt us, now that he can't bite?"

"I've thought of that also. Spike would go out of his way to...but he's too intelligent to starve himself to the point of delirium."

Buffy nodded as she looked over to where Willow was trying to get Spike to sit. "All right then, blood. I'll need money."

Giles got out his wallet, pulled out a twenty and watched as she pocketed it then left. His gaze followed the same track as Buffy's had earlier. "All right then," he muttered to himself as he began to make phone calls then look for the right volumes, "nightmares and prophesies, demons and..."

Willow slowly forced Spike into a sitting position. When she let go he slumped against the couch. He was so very pale, as if a fine powder dusted his face, even his lips had turned transparent white and he was shaking with fatigue and hunger.

She bit her bottom lip in turmoil, "Giles is there blood in the fridge?"

Her face darkened as he answered, "No, I'm afraid there isn't."

Spike was suffering so much and Willow couldn't stand by silently until Buffy got back, so she did the only thing that came to mind, she slit her wrist. Wincing in pain she went to the barely conscious vampire.

If possible his pallor seemed to pale more at the sight of her blood. "Shhh..." she soothed bringing her wrist to his slightly parted lips. His lips became soaked, blood began to dribble down his chin before any got into his mouth. The moment it did was immediately apparent. He grabbed her wrist desperately and began to drink the only thing that could save his undead life at the moment.

Still uttering soothing sounds Willow began to look him over for anything that could explain their present predicament. At that moment Giles entered carrying an ancient text.

"Willow I...Oh my, where did you get that knife?"

"He needed to eat, Buffy wouldn't have been back in time," she stated as she tried to soothe Spike who had pulled away from her looking like a scared toddler that had been caught doing something wrong.

She ran her wrist against his lips, "Tastes good, doesn't it? Go on, yes, that's right."

As soon as he had calmed and begun to eat she turned her attention back to Giles, "Have you found anything?"

"No, nothing. We need to have more information and since Spike is the only one who can give, you really shouldn't be doing that Willow, letting a vampire drink your blood is well, it..."

"I know the risks Giles and I couldn't let him suffer like that."

"Yes but," the doorbell cut him off.

"That must be Xander. Good Xan...Angel what are you doing here?"

"Cordelia had a vision, she said I was needed her. Also I've been having these odd dreams." Angel's voice sunk off as he caught site of Willow and Spike on Giles couch.

He started over, but was stopped by Giles, "In these dreams did Willow die?"

Angel turned back to look at the older man solemnly before nodding a slow affirmative.

"It seems Spike is having similar dreams, of a more intense nature." 


	5. Demon Revealed

"I'm walking into a clearing and I see Willow ahead, sometimes she's with Oz other times Spike. Neither of them sees me or the demon behind her. I try warning them, but I have no voice. When I try to run over I can't move. The only thing I can do is stand there and watch her die in his arms," Angel stopped his story as Buffy handed him a mug of blood, " Thanks."

He looked around the room at the others. Spike was asleep on the couch with a protective arm around Willow. She for her part looked perplexed. Giles' face was furrowed into a frown as he moved over to his bookshelves. Anya was snuggled on Xander's lap. It was the boy who caught his attention now for he'd gone pale.

"Well that's rather funny, because I'm having similar dreams. This means its demons messing with my brain doesn't it?" Xander took a deep breath from his prattling, "Oh boy. So we find it right and Buffy kills it right? Right Giles? Giles?"

Giles turned to look at Xander, "Well that depended on our ability to identify the demon, which requires a description."

Angel thought for a moment then started, "It was about my height, scaled dark with..."

"Red eyes and big white fangs," Xander interrupted.

"It killed her with a dagger, it looked almost ceremonial."

"I remember the fangs, huge white fangs and the eyes, evil red eyes."

Giles paused as he considered this evidence. He pulled several books from his shelf. Picking one up he skimmed through it a moment before pausing then handing it to Angel. Angel could only shake his head. He tried again, this time handing the book to Xander.

"No go."

Giles frowned as he tried again.

"No."

Sighing he handed them both books. Pulling another off his shelf he handed it to Anya.

"Hey don't I get..." Giles handed the book he was holding to Buffy and started to go into the next room to get another text.

"I want to help too," Willow said meekly as she untangled herself from Spike's grasp and began to make her way over to Giles, "After all it is my life we're trying to save."

As soon as she stood Spike's eyes snapped open, his face slowly contorted in horror. Frowning Willow watched him a moment before laying down next to him again. His body slowly relaxed and as he drifted back to a calmer sleep he wrapped a protective arm around her.

Giles watched the two a moment before he took the book Xander was holding, flipped a few pages and then handed the book back to Xander, "Would this be our demon?"

Xander looked at the picture of the demon, "Yep, that's the guy." Giles showed the book to Angel who agreed with Xander.

"It seems Angel was correct when he said this was ceremonial, this demon functions by consuming feminine victims while forcing the males who love her to suffer for seven days before it attacks. Spike's visions started about five days again, how long have you two been dreaming?"

"Five sounds right." Angel stated sounding grim. Two days did not give them much time.

"If it affects us male-type who love Willow then why is Giles all hunky dory?" Xander asked.

Giles only turned back to the book adjusting his glasses, "The demon only affects brothers and lovers. My feelings towards Willow are of a more fatherly nature."

Xander frowned a moment. "So let me see if I have this right. Brotherly feelings equals dreams about mister demon killing Willow. Lovey dovey relationship feelings equal," his voiced trailed to nothingness as they all turned to look at Spike, " Am I the only one whose thinking how dare he think of our Willow that way?"

They all expected Willow to say something, but instead they were met with silence for she had fallen asleep. 


	6. Splitting up

Not wanting to wake the sleeping witch they regrouped around Giles' kitchenette and waited for him to get off the phone with Tara. As soon as he did Buffy questioned, "So what'd she say?"

"I've explained the situation to her and she's going to try to set up a protection and a warning spell. She'll be over as soon as she's done with her last class and stopped in her room to get a few things. She's given me a list of the things she doesn't have, one of us will have to go get it. Later I think, we need to finds more information on this demon for it will likely attack after the next two days."

"That doesn't give us much time," Angel pointed out.

Giles quickly scanned the page they'd found on the demon. "It appears that to kill the demon we'll need a special type of sword, 'It will be given by a sent one.'" He paused, thinking.

"So," Xander started, " we have two days to find this sword."

"You won't be able to."

Five heads snapped around towards the unexpected voice. Angel was the first to react, "Doyle? How, how..."

Doyle only smiled and gazed upwards, "I was sent for you found the information on the demon. It seems you'll be needing help saving the girl so I was sent to give you this."

From no where he pulled a sword, it shimmered and was then handed to Angel. "Only you may use it," Doyle continued as he began to fade.

"Why?"

"Because your the one I gave it to. Say hello to Cordelia for me," he managed before vanishing in a flash of light.

"Who was that? Who is he?"

Five pairs of eyes snapped towards the open door. Willow gave a slight groan from the couch, "Riley, I'm trying to sleep."

"Oh!" Buffy stiffened , "Awww, Riley this is Angel, Angel Riley. That was um Doyle, he knew Angel and um Angel Riley is, Riley is my boyfriend."

Pain momentarily crossed Angel's face as Riley moved to stand at Buffy's side. That use to be his place, he'd told her to move on, but Angel forced himself to come back to what Giles was saying. "...having dreams about Willow, more specifically premonitions of her death?"

"I thought they were just dreams, they are dreams right?" Riley asked as he looked over their grim faces both confused and worried, "I recognized hostile seventeen."

"Spike," Willow cut in, "his name is Spike."

"Spike," Riley repeated for her sake, "and then the other guy." He stopped and wrapped his arm around Buffy. Did Angel just stiffen and looked pained? Confused Riley pulled away from her. He glanced at Willow hoping that she wouldn't ask who 'the other guy' was. He knew how much Oz's leaving had hurt her and he didn't want to open old wounds. The fates were not with him.

"You mean Oz, don't you? Angel and Xander saw Oz and then you," Willow bit her lip as tears started to streak paths down her face. She paused to look down at Spike's sleeping form.

"Buffy, Oz could be as weak as Spike, if not worse! He could die! Buffy, we have to find him!"

"Willow we have to think about this calmly."

"No! Giles, Oz could die! Spike almost died!" she cried near hysterics. Spike shifted next to her, tightening his grip.

"It's okay pet," he soothed without opening his eyes he pulled Willow back down to him before continuing, "The slayer and her bloody watcher can go find your Pup. Peaches and Commando can got get the other Witch's supplies. Ex-demon and her pet can go research and you can stay here and keep the nasty nightmares away from Spike." Silence enveloped the room as he finished.

"All right. That works. Lets go." 


	7. Angel, Riley, Dru

Riley glanced over at Angel once again wondering how they ended up working together. Buffy had never mentioned Angel to him, but she obviously meant a lot to him.

"Yes, yes, yes and no. Does that end this part of the test?" he questioned.

"Test?" Angel asked quirking a brow.

"You keep asking me all these questions and I can't help, but feel you testing me to see if I'm good enough for Buffy. Let me save your breath, I'm not. I don't deserve her, probably never will, but I love her with all my, hey how come she never mentioned you?"

"She never told you about me? About us?"

"Us? You're the guy. I knew it wasn't Parker that made her act so cautious, but..."

"Buffy cautious?"

Riley nodded, "May I ask you something? I don't mean to pry, but why didn't it work out between you two? What went wrong?"

Angel seemed to consider his question a moment, so much so that Riley began to become uncomfortable.

"I suppose it boils down to my being a vampire."

"What?" 

"I'm research girl," Willow smiled taking the cup of blood from Giles, "Just leave the books within reach and I'll find anything and everything I can about our demon. Don't look at me like that, see resolve face. I can't leave Spike, the book said that I had to remain near him or he'd keep reliving the nightmare. In my presence he can sleep. The demon won't attack for two days, you and Buffy need to find Oz. Giles, please, I'm going to be fine. Resolve face."

"All right Willow," Giles gave in, "Tara is working on a few spells she thinks might help. She's at her house getting supplies. Angel and Riley are getting anything else she might need. Xander and Anya are, I believe them to be researching at the library, you never know with those two. Buffy and I will try to find Oz. We'll be back before long."

She watched him go then force Spike to sit. She held the warm cup of blood under his nose. His eyes flutter and he silently attempted to take the cup from her.

"You're still too weak, " she told him softly as she continued to support both him and the cup. When he had finished they both laid down on the couch.

"You're still worn out, you should get some rest," she urged as she searched his face with her eyes. If what Giles had found was true then Spike had feelings for her and that totally destroyed her whole perception of him. The concept that Spike would give her a moments thought, and not because she was a friend of the Slayer, didn't fit somehow. Sure she'd grown accustom to him during his ordeal with the chip, and sure he was good looking, but it had to be a misunderstanding. His heart belonged with Dru and hers, hers was still in limbo. _Oh, Oz._ she thought.

"No," he hissed, "I want to know what the bloody hell is going on?" He was clearly resolved to not cooperating further till she had explained things. She explained as much as she could before his drowsiness forced him to succumb to exhaustion. When she was sure he was asleep she turned and began her researching.

Drowsiness was just beginning to take hold of her when Spike began to mummer. As the intensity of his dream increased so did his volume. Stiffly she lay next to him wondering if perhaps it was a memory.

"What do you mean Dru? I am who I was." A short paused followed.

"The dreams? Dru, baby, I already told you my dreams mean nothing." Another short pause.

"Well of course Luv, your dreams have meaning. Mine don't." A long pause followed and she could feel him tensing.

"Bloody hell Dru! She's the Slayer's chum! I am not in love with that redheaded chit! I love you Baby, only you."

"Pet, she means nothing, they're just dreams."

"I don't give a damn what the bloody doll says! And to hell with the stars!"

"No, Dru, Pet, Luv. Do you even know the first thing about him? They're nasty demons Luv, nasty."

"Are you sure that's what you want Pet? Will that make you happy?"

"Yes, Pet. Don't fret. I'll go back to Sunnyhell," he whispered something more, too faint for her to make out before settling back down.

Curiously she turned in his arms to once again look at his face. As the lines on his face eased her increased. 


	8. Enter Oz

"Giles, that's Oz's van."

Giles nodded looking puzzled, "For him to come back and not contact Willow."

"All I can say is he better be suffering from nightmares or I'll send him to one."

"Buffy, I understand your," he trailed off when Devon opened the door they were standing in front of.

"How long are you going to stand there?"

They glanced at each other worried before stepping inside.

"Yes, um," Giles started.

"Devon we're looking for Oz."

Devon looked startled a moment, "Oz? I don't know where Oz is."

"His van is in your driveway."

Again Devon looked startled, he glanced towards the living room then back to them. "He gave it to me?" he tried hopefully.

A weak cracked voice filtered in from the living room, "Hang on Willow."

Devon found himself following Giles and Buffy to Oz.

"He came back about two days ago, barely made it here. My parents are out of town, I didn't know what to do. What did Willow do to him?"

Buffy turned on him, "What makes you think Willow did anything?"

"She must have done something, because he just left. Just dropped out of the band and left. Do you know what its like to lose your dream because of some girl? The new guy we got can't even compare to Oz. I know Oz couldn't have done anything, I mean this is Oz we're talking about."

"Oz couldn't do anything?" Buffy screamed at him, "I'll have you know that."

"Not now Buffy." Giles cut her off, " We need to get Oz out of here."

Oz whimpered on the couch, "How could someone so small lose so much blood?"

Buffy's attention went from Devon to the boy she once respected, "Has he eaten?"

"When he comes out of it. Must have been a bad break up, huh?"

"Worse then you can imagine." Buffy grunted as she picked Oz up, " Let's go."

"Wait, where are you taking him?"

"Why do you care?"

"Hey, if he gets better, maybe he'll stay. You know get the band back together and..."

Giles shut the door in Devon's face, "What a disagreeable young man."

"I didn't know Oz could scream so loud." Buffy grimaced as Giles opened his front door.

"Neither did I." Angel winced as he moved to take Oz from Buffy.

"I got him. You and Riley get Spike," she grunted as she shifted Oz and started up the staircase to Giles' room.

"Is he all right?" Willow asked in agony as she began to follow Buffy.

"He's going to be all right Willow. He was at Devon's."

"Oh. For, for how long?"

"Two days." Buffy told her as she lay Oz on Giles' bed.

"So you get in bed with Oz and Spike will be here in a few moment."

"Devon?" Oz questioned weakly as he opened his eyes, "Buffy? Where am I?"

"Giles' room."

"Willow?"

"She's here."

Willow smiled and gave him a small wave. A small smile played at Oz's features, "Hey Will. Been dreaming about you."

"Yea. Nightmares." Willow said for him before holding back a sob, "Buffy, you tell him."

"Oh, um Oz the nightmares are due to a demon which attacks after making lovers and brothers suffer for seven days, it..." she was interrupted when a howl from downstairs pierced their ears. Letting out a squeak Willow rushed down the stairs. 


	9. Angel, Riley, Spike

Riley set the magic shop bag on the table as Angel moved to wake Spike. When he succeeded Spike let out a growl and jumped away from him.

"Spike, we need to get you upstairs," Angel said as he moved to help Spike to his feet.

"Don't touch me," Spike growled.

"Come on. We need to get you upstairs," Riley told him as he reached down to help the worn out vampire to his feet. Spike turned on him, giving him a swift kick to the stomach before doubling over with a howl of pain.

Angel jumped to his aid and Spike tried to throw him off. "Get away from me!" he screamed vamping out and throwing a fist Angel's way. Angel quickly blocked it and the next. Still throwing punches Spike jumped on him, tumbling both of them to the ground. Riley rushed to Angel's aid pulling Spike off.

"Get your bloody hands off me." Spike raged trying to shove him away and receiving another jolt of pain that sent him reeling.

Just as Willow reached the bottom of the stairs Giles came rushing in the door.

"Spike stop," Giles ordered in an irritated tone, "You'll likely break something."

All three men stopped what they were doing and looked to Giles sheepishly. He merely sighed and looked to see if they'd broken anything as a concerned Willow went to Spike.

"Spike, you need to get upstairs," she told him soothingly as she lifted one of his arms over her shoulder and slid one of hers around his waist. Leaning on her as his weakened legs began to buckle under his own weight he allowed himself to be led upstairs.

"They just wanted to help you," Willow told him.

"No one I hate is going to be touching me, especially not the bloody poof."

"You all right?" Riley asked as he helped Angel to his feet.

Willow helped Spike over to the bed before looking at Oz. His eyes were wide and a look of horror covered his face.

"I managed to explain the demon to him before he slipped back into the nightmare," Buffy offered her.

Willow looked down at Spike whose face was equally horrified.

"I guess I had better get into bed with them," Willow sighed as she crawled in between the two men.

"Somehow that sounded wrong," Buffy joked half-heartily.

"Yea," Willow whispered as both Oz and Spike fell asleep and slipped their arms around her. She laughed coldly, "Well I wanted Oz back and now I have both him and Spike."

"Yea," Buffy agreed as she slipped from the room. 


	10. Buffy and Angel

"I'm going to find Xander and Anya, they've been gone far too long," Giles threw to Riley and Angel as he went out the door.

"Riley, can you fix um tea? Giles should have tea. I need to talk to Angel," Buffy asked as she led Angel into the next room.

Buffy moved to cover the windows. She moved about the room making sure no light could get in. He moved to help her, but she pulled back.

"Just in case you want to get some books," she stammered idly as she fingered a book.

Angel looked around the darkened room knowing she was taking her time, gathering her words. "It won't be dawn for a while."

He kept quiet a moment longer, watching her bustle about nervously, before saying, "Enough evading. You wanted to talk to me?"

She moved to him searching his face, "I wanted, wanted to say I was sorry. You shouldn't have met Riley like that and..."

"When were you planning on telling me about him, or him about me?"

"Never?" she shrugged hopefully, "I was just trying to avoid the topic. It still hurts, you know, to think about you and Riley didn't need to see that. Angel I never wanted to hurt you and telling you about Riley, well there would be no avoidance and..."

"I like him."

"You what?"

"I like him, he seems to really love you. He cares for you and hey he's mortal, human even." Angel smiled as he reached out a hand and cupped her face, "I told you to move on and you found normal. He can be with you when I can't, how I can't."

Tears began to streak slow paths down her face. He brushed them away with his other hand. "Don't. It's a good thing Buffy. We both want it, both need it," his voice trailed to nothingness as his lips fell on hers. They both succumb to a long, slow passionate kiss. It deepened and turned frantic as they pulled each other as close as possible. Then as suddenly as it started it ended and they jumped back from each other.

"You have a boyfriend."

"I have a boyfriend."

"I'm, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." Angel brushed her face with is hand before pulling her to his chest.

He rested his chin on top of her head as she snuggled against him, "It won't happen again. As soon as this is over I'm going back to L.A."

"Yea, until they send you back to me. Angel this is so hard. If your need in LA why do you keep getting sent back to me?"

"I suppose you still need me."

"I'm with Riley."

"I know."

Riley stumbled back from the doorway, he'd seen enough. He jumped as the kettle on the stove began to whistle. He reached over to slam it off and pour Buffy her cup of tea. How could she kiss him? Didn't she realize he was in the next room?

He choked back his pain and poured another cup of tea. He searched the kitchen quickly and collected a tray. He stopped in the doorway on his way upstairs, they were still in each other's arms talking over their situation._ How to deal with me_, he thought bitterly as he went up the stairs to Giles' room.

"How are you?" he asked.

Willow shifted her gaze to smile at him tightly, "About as comfortable as I can get squeezed between these two."

She slowly untangled herself enough to sit and took the cup he offered her, "Thanks."

"Willow, I...Can I asked you a favor?"

"What is it?"

"Tell me about Buffy and Angel." 


	11. Demon Attack

"Anya," Xander sighed trying to explain without upsetting her, "Wills plus impending danger equals no sex."

"But," she pouted, "not for two days."

Then she leaned towards him grinning, "Besides, I failed math."

He wet his lips looking her over. "Wills. Danger. Impending. Sex later," he stressed each word pointing to the books.

"Nice to know you two are working," Giles said letting his presence be known, "Have you found anything?"

"G-man, don't sneak up on us like that," Xander grinned.

Giles sighed and shook his head, "I take it you two have found nothing. While Willow's life is threatened all you two can do is flirt! We need to know how to kill it. Do we cut out an eye? Do we gouge out its heart? You two are suppose to be finding this out! The demon may very well attack if it feels threatened."

"Oh, and exactly how does it feel threatened?" Xander threw back.

Giles sighed rubbing his nose, "Xander, please, we need to focus."

"Found something," Anya offered brightly, "If the demon feels threatened it'll attack early."

"Anya, we already know that," Xander quipped.

She glared at him before looking back at the book. "It feels threatened if, Giles..." she broke off shoving the book to him and pointing at the paragraph she'd just been reading.

Giles voice was low, grave, "We need to contact Buffy, the demon may very well attack tonight."

"Would someone care to fill in the lost guy?" Xander questioned looking confused.

"We have the sword, it has to know this. It'll go after her tonight," Anya stated glaring at him.

"Then I say we get over there."

"Xander, you and Giles go. I'll call Buffy."

The doorbell rang just as Riley was walking back down the stairs. He set the tray down wondering where Buffy and Angel were. He hoped they weren't still alone in the dim room. The doorbell rang again. Forcing away the anguish he was feeling, not just over the kiss, but everything Willow had told them he went to the door.

"Hi," Tara managed shyly trying to hide behind her hair.

He smiled reassuringly to the insecure girl as he led her inside, "They're upstairs."

"M..m-my supplies?" she questioned as she stared at the floor her shoulders hunching, as if she were trying to make herself disappear.

As he got the supplies for her Buffy and Angel came in from the other room.

"Angel this is Tara, Tara Angel. She's a Wicca friend of Willow's." Buffy introduced.

Angel smiled warmly at her, "Hi."

"Hi." she answered back softly as Riley returned carrying the supplies they had purchased for her.

As soon as she had her things they all followed the nervous girl upstairs. As she reached the top of the stairs she froze, a look of horror coming over her face. Her bag fell to the floor as she gasp in fright. Her eyes widened as she stepped off the staircase frantically searching every corner with her eyes. "It's here," she whispered harshly.

"Are you sure?" Buffy asked looking around.

"I-I-I can feel it."

Tara continued to search with her eyes and froze as her faze fell on a corner near the bed. She stumbled back falling to the floor as the air in the corner began to shimmer.

Booming, haunting laughter filled the room as the large scale covered demon came into the light. Somewhere in the distance the phone began to ring. The beast's laughter soon drowned it out.

Willow opened her eyes sleepily, took in the demon and whimpered.

"Angel?" she asked fearfully for she couldn't see him and he was the only one who could kill the beast. Beside her Oz and Spike both stared at the beast. It grinned at the three maliciously raising a glittering dagger.

"I feed off your fear, soon I shall have the innocence's blood," it boomed showing its fangs.

"Not bloodly likely," Spike growled as he leapt toward the creature. At the same time Oz grabbed Willow, pulling her under him, using his own body as a shield.

Angel leapt into the fray, helping Spike drive back the demon. The beast threw Spike against the nearest wall with on of its clawed paws, then turned its attention to Angel.

"You cannot defeat me," it boomed raising the knife and slicing at him.

"The girl is mine. You shall parish."

"Big words considering you'll be dead in a few moments," Buffy spat as she delivered a kick to the creature.

Riley returned from a short excursion downstairs bearing weapons. "Buffy ax," he called as he tossed her the weapon. Spike grabbed a sword, leaving him with a dagger. The four of them managed to beat the creature back into a corner, yet it wouldn't die.

Finally Angel drove his sword into the creature's heart and they were all suddenly thrown back. Its skin began to creak with beams of light as it howled in agony. Then it exploded in a shower of light.

Breathing heavily they started to pick themselves off the floor.

_Note:_

Jo-e: Thanx for being my first reviewer. I wasn't sure if anyone was going to like this, I wrote it so long ago.

Dalpal: Thanx. This is more, hope you like it as well. As to what Dru was saying to Spike it will mostly be revealed in the last chapter. 


	12. Riley's Decision

Spike slumped back onto Giles' bed, maybe now he could get some sleep. He glanced over to where Oz was still on top of Willow. They were staring at each other, obviously in shock. It passed quickly and Oz jumped away from her as if burned.

"I should go," he said in his usual monotone though there was an undertone of pain in his voice. As he turned towards the stairs he swayed almost falling, but Riley caught him.

"After you get some rest," Riley told Oz as he eased him onto Giles' bed.

"All of you get some sleep," Buffy ordered as she, Angel, Riley and Tara walked from the room.

When they got downstairs they all followed Tara out the front door.

Buffy smiled at her, "Thank you."

Tara smiled shyly, nodded and then hurried off.

Buffy slumped against the door, looking between Angel and Riley before speaking, "Riley we need to talk. I need to tell you about Angel and I..."

"Willow already did."

"What? What did she tell you? Why did she tell you?"

"She told me because I asked and she told me everything she could. I get everything, I mean I understand most of it, except I don't understand why Angel left you."

"So she could find normal, and she has."

"Normal?" Riley choked on the word, "She obviously hasn't told you about the Initiative. Besides what is normal anyway? If I had what you two had I wouldn't let it go, no matter how hard it was, no matter what obstacles stood in the way. Did it ever occur to you that Willow is a witch, and a good one? Given time she'd probably come up with a spell to make your soul permanent. You want to be fully honest with me don't you, your going to tell me you kissed. I know. I saw."

"But we do," whispered Buffy.

Riley looked at her in confusion, "We do what?"

"Have something special."

"Not like you and him."

Angel took an unnecessary breath, searching for the strength for what he'd have to do, get through to Riley that he, Angel, couldn't be with Buffy. That it was ultimately Riley she would end up with not he. He paused a moment more, feeling the tension that vibrated in the air, before speaking. And Riley listened, really listened to Angel explain why he couldn't be with the girl he loved with all his unbeating heart, and still Riley shook his head.

"You don't understand," Riley told them when Angel finished, " Nothing is ever perfect. We never will reach that fairy tale love, but that doesn't mean that if you find your soul-mate you give up because its hard. When you love someone that much you make it work no matter what or who gets in the way."

Buffy rushed to his side, "No, Riley. Don't you see, it has to be this way. I love you."

Riley brushed a lock of hair from her face, " You do love me and I love you, but your love for him is stronger, stronger then ours will ever be." Tears glistening in his eyes at the knowledge of what he was doing and the impact it would have on his life. His eyes memorized her face, needing this one last moment and needing one last kiss. His lips were gentle, barely touching, as light as a breeze and then he was gone, leaving his lover to her true love. He knew the road for them would be rough, rougher then his would ever be, and somehow that small bit of knowledge held its own solace.

_Note:_

redefined- thanx for the review. Hopefully this chapter answered your question. 


	13. Of Dreams

Willow was once again lying between Oz and Spike. She silently watched as Oz turned his back to her and fell asleep. She thought the pain had numbed, but being this close to him and having him turn away caused her heart to ache and her eyes to burn. Silently tears slide down her cheeks for she was too conscience and too caring of his need for sleep to wake him with outright sobbing. Her body hummed in pain.

From behind her a voice came, low and strong, "Let me take the pain away."

Slowly she turned to stare into Spike's cool gaze. Taking this as in invitation he let his lips graze hers as he pulled her under him. His hands began to run softly over her curves, he could feel her trembling.

"Oz," she whimpered his name as a protest.

"Is asleep," he whispered into her ear, "The Slayer, Peaches and that bloody commando wanker are downstairs, just outside. You can't tell me that doesn't excite you."

Willow swiftly glanced at Oz, then back at Spike, biting her lower lip. She closed her eyes trying to think rational thoughts, but damn it she couldn't, not with his hands doing what they were doing or his mouth trailing kisses along her neck. Finally she managed to whisper, "He'd wake up."

A chuckle and a characteristic smirk were all that met her protest. He brushed his lips against hers again urging them to part. She accepted his kiss a moment, getting lost in the feel of him. This startled her and she pulled away from him easing his hands away from her before giving him her resolve face and telling him, "Spike, no."

"All right Luv, you win."

Spike chuckled to himself, taking in her confused look before kissing each eyelid. With the same display of tenderness he rolled to his side, pulling her to his chest and running his hand through her hair. The demon recognizing him as a lover confused him. Her knew he was drawn to Willow, that there was a spark of infatuation and each night she would haunt him as he slept, but did that constitute love? After Dru had forced him to leave he'd sworn himself from love. He didn't want anyone to capture his heart as she had. There would be other women of course, but never again could he allow love. Yet somehow when he wasn't watching, was still looking to win Dru back this petite redhead had gotten under his skin, this attack proved that to him.

He smiled contentedly as she snuggled closer, the stress of the night finally beginning to catch up with her. Her continued running his hand through her fiery hair all the while muttering in a voice to soft for her delicate human ears. Her kept his voice just below her hearing range, allowing the rumble of it to comfort her. He winced as a memory of doing this for Dru hit him, the same pain Willow had felt a moment before gripped him now. Cursing silently to himself and closing his eyes he forced himself to push it away and concentrate on the tense woman in his arms. Something was still bothering her.

After an eternity that was really only minutes she mustered up enough courage to speak. "Spike?" she questioned in a hushed tone as if fearful of her own words.

"Yes Red?" his voice was equally hushed.

"I, um, while we were downstairs and you were asleep, um, before Buffy came back with Oz, you, you were talking in your sleep. I don't know but it almost sounded like more then a dream. You, you were arguing with Drusilla and I was wondering if it could have been, been a memory?"

Spike chuckled at her rambling, "You'll have to do better then that Pet, what were we arguing about?"

A frown crossed the young woman's pixie face as she considered her words carefully, now she decided was most definitely no time to ramble. She took a breath and continued what she had started, "You were having dreams about me and she wanted you to come here."

She could feel tense beside her. He paused a moment before saying that the argument was indeed a memory.

"How long have you been having dreams about me?" she asked tensely.

"Since I left Sunnyhell the second time."

"After kidnapping Xander and me?"

His gaze wandered over her face, taking in and savoring every reaction. Purposely he brushed a wisp of red from her forehead before answering, "Yes, Luv."

"What happened between Dru and you?"

A frown began to mar his face as he considered her endless curiosity and her question. He could easily lie. His brain scrambled for the dozen different things he could tell her. Eventually he decided on the truth.

"After leaving her I went back and tortured her till she loved me again. We were happy for a brief period, or so I thought we were. Then one day she pulled me aside, confronted me about the dreams and telling me to come here before telling me of her new lover. Poof of a demon too, don't know what she sees in the wanker."

"So you left her?"

"She was happy."

_Loves her enough to let her go. Oh Spike, why didn't she see what she had? It's such a waste._ She wet her lips and startled when she noticed it drew his eyes to them.

"Spike, what are the..."

Drowsy and tired of questions he cut her off, "Enough for now. Got to sleep, Red."

Running his hand through her hair once more, he pulled her head back down to his chest and closed his eyes. She closed her eyes and steadied her breathing, waiting till she was certain sleep claimed him. She reopened her eyes, allowing them to gaze over him. Silently she brought her thumb to his lips, running it across them slowly. She held her breath then relaxed when he did nothing more then stir and settle back down. To him and the emptiness of the apartment she whispered five words.

"I dream of you, too." 


End file.
